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Two-For-One Legacy Sporkage!

Hello, Sporkers! There's been a distinct lack of spork around these parts lately. School resuming tends to do that, but never fear! Upon recommendation I have a new selection for your perusal. Enjoy!

Link: I want it bad, your bad romance.
Title: Updates with Bloou...and some other stuff THAT'S NOT VAGUE
Author: bloou13
Description: Updates, a loss , horrendous spacing, and a new legacy. What other things would you expect from a girl with A.D.H.D.? Insert irrelevant details such as "author has ADD"?

Updates with Bloou...and some other stuff... I'm not going to lie, that's some pretty shoddy photo-editing. Also, I hate updates. I think they just clutter up the Exchange and people should get blogs. But that's just me.

It was just an average day. I was in my office talking about an upcoming event with my clients. Special "clients" or just the regular kind?
"Okay, so you both probely FAIL know why you are here.." Because you don't know that a proper ellipsis consists of three dots, not two?

Then one of my clients,SPACEJenny spoke, "Accually FAIL. And comma. we have no idea why we are here." The other one, Berry, spoke tooColon? I don't know, that's really awkward structuring for dialogue. There should be SOME form of punctuation here, at least. "Yeah, why are we here again?" You're the narrator's very special clients, and she's going to introduce you to her very special friends for an outing. You're paying.

I sighed. "You really don't know?" They shook their heads. "WellCOMMA if I have to tell youCOMMA! I must tell everyone." I started my long, painful story.
"It was one afternoon. About an hour ago to be exact. I was sitting at my computer prepaird Oh my God. EPIC FAIL. to write the next chapter in "A Cooking Leagcy." SHE CAN'T EVEN SPELL "LEGACY"? REALLY? When something stopped me. Sentence fragments? Almost all of my CC was gone. I was flabbergasted. I quickly went to Mod the Sims to find out what had happned FAIL. I went through all of the instructions. Some twice. Nothing worked. My CC was gone. I tried one last thing. Then what I did was a mistake. I forgot to back up my game and now everthing FAIL I have ever done in this game is gone."


Berry started to speakfullstop "Waitsemicolon then why am I here?" I told her the truth. "Because I accually FAIL like you so I re-made you." "Aweseom FAIL." She Don't capitalize that. responed OH MY GOD. "Anyway." I said, continuing my story. "I really enjoyed writing the legacy so I though. Why stop now? THIS SENTENCE STRUCTURE FAILS LIFE. That should be "...so I thought: why stop now?" I remberd OH MY JESUS the talk I had with the real Jenny. If I didn't get my flash drive this summer I was going to swich FAIL to pet stories LOL, someone actually bought Pet Stories? and make a new legacy. But this one was going to have Jenny as my founder,SPAAAACE because she asked and she is my friend, and all her kids names are going to be after her faviorit FAIL things." (Not a copy of My favorite things: A legacy, Because it's called Jenny's world, and I have never read My favorite thingsI just saw the tital. So I hope the author won't hate me or sue me..) Hey, look, Jules! You get a badly-structured shout-out! Does she honestly think people can sue each other over Legacy titles and that theme has never, ever been done before? Also, OH MY GOD, YOU'RE ALLOWED TO PRESS THE ENTER KEY, HONEY.
"WaitCOMMA HOLY SHIT then how do you have this CC?" Berry asked. "I didn't know my father had just deleted my CC hair." Too bad you're left with your shit-ugly and poorly meshed CC clothing. I responded. "WowCOMMA your FACE IS stupid." Jenny said to me. "Hey Jenny." I said to her. "What?" She respoded Stop using that word if you can't spell it.. "Shut up." I said. "I let my A.D.H.D. get the best of me,SPACEagain." I know a girl with ADD, and while she is supremely obnoxious, she's also rather smart. So I don't know what author's trying to do here.

"And heyCOMMA you better be nice. You're the founder of my legacy." I said to her.
"What?" She NO asked, sounding flabergasted. "I never agreed on this!" She NO! yelled at me.
"Let me review the chat we had like a few weeks ago on blooprop ...REALLY.:
bloou3:So Jenny.I'm thinking of stopping a Cooking legacy and starting a new one.
JennyCat:Aww why?
bloou13: Because Cooking Legacy is boring me. But what should I make this new leagcy about?
JennyCat: How about I be the founder and you name the kids after my favorit things. That could be the tital too!
bloou13:Already done. How about Jenny's World?
JennyCat: LOVE IT! *pokes own eyeballs out*
"See?" I said to Jenny. "That's not what I said!" She yelled at me. "Well it was close. Come on Berry." I said to my clients. Please learn where the enter key is.

"W-where are you going?" Jenny asked me. "Berry and I are leaving and going to a better house than this." I said to here Where?. "W-w-wait!" Jenny studerd I'M SORRY DID I JUST STUTTER. "Bye Jenny!" I said about to close the door. "Oh, and have fun with Big Me." I said and evily laughted DOUBLE FAIL my way to the new house Berry and I were staying at. Leaving Jenny to the leagcy. Please learn how to spell that word! It's just sad.

"Oh Plumbob." Jenny replied. This Simself is so F1. :(
WellCOMMAAAAA that's all for now! So I am starting a new leagcy and should have the chapter out today. But why don't we see Jenny's house before we go? Or you could just stop the chapter and never write again until you learn to proofread...

Here Jenny. Have fun! MWA HA HA HAAAAAAAA! Did she seriously leave the walls down when there's ONLY ONE WALL?!

"You think I'm happy about this? You think I will stand this? I'm Jenny Favorite and I will not stand this!" Yes, yes you will.
Hey Jenny? Yes you will. MWA HA HA HAAAAAA!
Look out for the next chapter of:
Jenny's World: A legacy by Bloou! Hey, look, she learned how to spell legacy!
Also I am sorry all you cooking legacy fans. But a Cooking Legacy is over. I'm sorry but please keep reading this story. It would make Berry Happy. I'M BERRY HAPPY 8D
~Bloou13-former author of a Cooking legacy-current author of Jenny's World:A legacy. O RLY?

And because I know you can't get enough of this quality prose, here's the first chapter!

Link: I'm infected by your genetics!
Title: AsJenny's World-A legacy by Bloou Chapter 1 "AsJenny's World"? WTF?
Description: New babies. New huseband REALLY?!. New Nanny. New legacy!

Hey everyone! Bloou here with a leagcy FAIL that I might really enjoy.
Berry- "Hey!"
Aww shut it Berry. Just go home, Berry. She doesn't even go to this school.
Any way a little tip:
When words are bold I am talking to my sims,SPACEnot you, my sims. Have fun with that, sweetums.

"Hmm. Now what should I.." Step away from the computer and go to an English class. PLEASE.


Me- "BERRY!" All these Simselves look the same.
Berry- "Oh sorry."
Me- "Yeah. What ever is one word. You're more annoying in this neiborhood FAILITY FAIL FAIL..."
Berry- "Hee hee. Thank you."

Anyway... here is the founder:
Name: Jenny Favorite SEW ~CREATIVE
Aspiration: Family
LTW: Have 6 grand childern FAIL. *faints* Get over it.
She is an Aquarius Statse(spelled wrong SO FIX IT.):
5 shy/outgoing, 5 lazy/neat, 5 serious/playful, 6 nice. What about active?
Lucky Number: 5 (wow, I wouldn't have guessed) lolwhut Sims have favorite numbers?
Turn On: Black Hair/Fitness
Turn Off: Fat Ew those fatties can just gtfo my legacy~*** LAWLS
Neiborhood: Plesentview (were else?) Veronaville? Strangetown? Belladonna Cove? A custom neighborhood? The neighborhood where they can spell "neighborhood"?
Job: Law Enforcement/Security Guard.

HeyCOMMA Jenny Yeah, I'm not fixing your coding.
Wach ya doin? D:
"Making a samich. You want one?" Nah. You got any hallucinogenic drugs? It might make this sporking easier.
Mmmm. I'll pass.
I don't think I will...


"Umm you can see me behind this newspaper..." LAWLS THIS WAS SO NECESSARY

So, Jenny likes fitness hu? Well why don't we give her some?
Come on favorite! Work it! Come one COME ALL TO THIS TRAGIC AFFAIR push it! PUSH IT REAL GOOD!
"What am I? Giving birth?"
Not yet...hee he hee... The Sim's got a fucking weird-ass nose.

So we went to theplacethatIcan'tremberbutwhoreallygivesacrap? Psst, crack kills. Pull up your pants. Also, LOL, you can pick out the word "whore" in there!

Jenny.Stay away.
That is Don Lotheratio Please don't barf all over your keyboard like that. It's messy. A.K.A. "lady's man".
"But..he has blach Is she hocking a loogie? hair."
Your point?

Hey how about dudewhoIdon'tknowthenameofbutI'mgoingtocallhimDudeinaskirt? o hai, Brandon Lillard.
"Really, ever herd sheep? It's fun. Also, have you ever heard of spacing?" SRSLY
Yes. But does this annoy you?
Goodthan. That wasn't funny.

Hey what about him?
"No black hair."
Too bad. I am your God! But I like Jeebus better! He died for my sins. Would YOU die for my sins? THOUGHT NOT. MWA HA HA HAAAAAA!
"Oooooooooooooo god of what?!" Misspelled words and poor grammar, perhaps.
God of sims.
"That must be awesome."
Trust me. It is. *evil laguh.* I think she hocked a loogie again.

Jenny- "So I'm in a legacy. Wana get married?"
Dude with no black hair Sorry, Joe Carr.- "Why would I want to be in a legacy." I guess that was a statement, not a question.
Jenny- "You'll be famouse." HAHAHAHA no

Dude with no black hair. -"Famouse you say?" I bet he thinks "famouse" is some special new word with awesome connotations, not merely a typo.

Look look look it's Unsavory Charlatan!
Unsavory Charlatan- "Can I have 20 dollers?"
I like this guy. Probably because he wants "dollers," and a "doller" is a person who makes dolls, I'm assuming. But he can't have my twenty dollars! I need that to buy a CD!

So their relationship starts off with red hands. Sqwee! *headdesk*

Joe- "So I'm going to gossip about some one That's ONE WORD. you don't even know!"
Jenny- "And I'm going to pretend like I care."
Joe- "Is that a plumbob I see?"
Jenny- "Shhh don't point it out. The viewrs might not notice!" You could have, I don't know, angled the shot appropriately or used the "PlumbBobToggle" cheat, but I don't want to stress you out or anything.

So I would show you what they did but I can't think of a good caption. Really tell me is this...



...move in...reall that interesting? Random picspam concludes with a dumb typo. YAY.

Jenny- "So Joe I've been thinking. Wana FAIL get married?"
Joe- "When did you think that? We've only been togather FAIL for one sim day."
Jenny- "When I saw the guy in the skirt."
Joe- "Umm. Alrigty SUPER-FAIL then..."

Jenny- "Let's get married right now in my work uniform! classy~*
Joe- "Okay."
Joe Favorite
Fortan OH MY GOD. It's spelled out IN THE GAME! Are you kidding me?! -LTW earn 100,000$. Yeah, that'll happen.
Stats-who really cares? *raises hand* I like stats...

*Gulp* well you know were this goes. They look like they're doin it rong.

So I want more mony ASJKHGFDR;. Get me more moneyCOMMA Joe!
"Can I do it in my underwear?"
Shure. FAIL

Jenny- "Look I got premoted to FAILURE. So what have you been doing all day?"
Joe- "This."
Jenny- "Oh. Fun."
Right? What a happy marriage~

We got this and some invisable FAILURE rocks. Yee-haw? GET ALONG, LIL DOGGIES!


Bump #2

Jenny- "Hey I'm gunna GONNA give birth now."
Okay. Have fun with that! D: I get so excited when my Sims have babies...

And she produced baby Hermione! FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUU--
Hermione-Favorite book categorie FAIL, Book-Harry Potter series. *ETERNAL RAGE BEGINS NOW*

We also had Nessia.
Nessia-Twilight Saga. Even *I* know the kid's name is Renesmee and she's nicknamed Nessie, not Nessia. Also, you fail forever because you named a kid after the worst-named kid in the history of all fiction.

We also gave the house a makeover. Isn't is ZOMG-mazing? No.

And I also gave Joe a makeover. Why? Because I'm nice like that...sometimes...sometimes. No one cares.

Ok so we are going to have a quiz. First one to get it right get's a cookie!
A. Britney Spears and Darth Vador What the fuck.
B. Elmo and Barny What the FUCK.
C. Jenny and Joe *ding ding ding*
D. Justen Bebier and Miranda Cosgrove. Justin Bieber can't get laid, so that's right out.
:) I'm so nice! :) NO. YOU SOIL STAR WARS. Also, you never actually gave out a quiz question. You just said "We're having a quiz." FAIL.

You wouldn't. OH YES HE DI-ID!

"But I had. Too."
*Evil Glare.*
*Keeps evil glaring... OH MY GOD. Legacy writers worldwide: STOP BITCHING ABOUT THE NANNY! Stick your stove in someone's inventory or lock away the chilluns or get rid of your TV, but stop bitching about the nanny when most of them are semi-competent. If this is so important to you, make one of the parents quit their jobs and shut up.

Nanny- "So there was this gost FAIL and he was all "BOO!" and I was all "Ahhh!"
Joe- "Arn't FAIL you stupposted FAIL to be working?" PWND
Nanny- "Arn't FAIL you?"
Joe- *Sad face.* "You win this roundCOMMA Nanny..."

"I threw up."
"Alot." THAT IS NOT A WORD. *foams at the mouth*
"*Evil Glare.*"
Love you too! ^_^

"Why do I have to clean it?"
You think the maid's will? "The maid is will"? WTF?
"I thought you didn't like the maids here."
I don't.
I'm confusing and I like it! Please make sense or shut up.

Jenny- "Yeah! Woo Hoo!"
Joe- "Can I play?"
Jenny- "NO!" Why is the Sim's hair black now?

Joe- "Too bad!"
Jenny- "I will throw this controller at you!" No you won't.

Hey Jenny.
Wach ya doin? *sporks eyes out*
Ok THAT'S NOT A WORD EITHER! It's "OK" or "okay"! have fun!

Hmm. Just like my dad. My dad just watches Law and Order and plays guitar...

Why do I love this picher? I don't know. It's pretty unremarkable.

Becaues FAIL Hermione is in it! ^_^ *STABS SOMETHING*

Jenny- "My tummy hurt. I no speak English good."
Joe- "Don't puke on me!"

Nanny- "Yeah! You go boy!"
Joe- "Must run! Also me no speak English good!"

You know I acually like you. You are a good Nanny/ SEE?
"You had to tell me this while I'm in the bathroom?"
"Umm okay."
Do not denie FAIL my A.D.H.D! BIRD! Are you parodying yourself? No one, not even with ADD, is that random!

"Look I'm home and I brought mony OHMYGOD and stuff!"

"And a baby pop!"
Cool now help your children grow up. BIRFDAY TIEMZ~

Jenny- "Grow up good. Nessie. And never forget. Sentence fragments."
Jenny- "Oh. I knew that..."

Everybody now Awwww! NO But dangCOMMA she got Joe's nose! OMG TEH_HORROR

Don't get the nose Nessie. Don't get the nose! She totally will.

Awwww she got the noes! OH NOSE, THE NOES! Wait, hold up, I'm confused...

But their PENGUINS ARE still cute! ^_^

"I popped again." Congratulations.
"Didn't you want to know?"
Don't really care. Tell me when the baby is born. THE APATHY. IT CUTS MAH_HART~

Jenny- "Say bear."
Hermione- "Cow."
Jenny- "*Hit'sface.*" Hey, at least she said something. And that apostrophe DOES NOT BELONG THERE

And she learns how to talk...

...so does Nessie... I thought her name was Nessia?

...and how to walk...

...Hermione too! Man these girls skill fast! SO BORED. You don't have to record EVERY SINGLE SECOND of your Sims' lives if you don't have anything interesting to say. In my observational Legacy I could probably count the number of toddler-training picspam on one hand, because it's just not that cool.

"So I"m going to give birth now."
Okay. Have fun.

And we had baby Firestar.
Firestar-From "Warriores" a series. That's not random. What series?

Hey. Simme. What is that word you just barfed onto my screen? Don't look so exited.
Well that's all for now! Things to think about:
-New Heir? Obviously.
-Will I change Firestar's head to red? Why would you?
-Will Bears become cows? No.
-Will Berry Shut up? I think she needs to take her meds.
-Will I win a million bucks? (I wish!) I bet you do.
Find out next time in:
Jenny's World: A legacy by Bloou





( 14 comments — Leave a comment )
Oct. 22nd, 2010 01:06 am (UTC)
Note to author: writing your updates like that does not make them funny or entertaining. They are still a waste of time. Use your Sims 2 page blog, or get your own off-site journal.

And please learn to use the spellchecker!
Oct. 22nd, 2010 01:07 am (UTC)
"That is Don Lotheratio Please don't barf all over your keyboard like that. It's messy."

On the topic of nannies, IDGI. Sure, they're occasionally stupid, but it's because they're on free will and babies take shit-all effort to look after anyway.
I had the most awesome nanny in my game the other day. She cleaned my Sim's house, looked after her daughter really well and even played with her and hugged her and stuff. It was so cool. :D
Oct. 22nd, 2010 01:28 am (UTC)
Nannies actually get sort of useful in AL, you know! ~the moar you know~
Oct. 22nd, 2010 02:24 am (UTC)
IDG the hate on nannies, either. I mean, what do they think babysitters and nannies actually do? They look after the baby, sure, but they attend to their own needs as well.
Some of the spelling mistakes look just...ridiculous; it looks like she did it on purpose, but sadly, I doubt this is the case.
Tip-top sporking, June! You're correctomundo! School does make sporkings less frequent and it's sad. =(
Oct. 22nd, 2010 03:25 am (UTC)
Um, okay... I have no idea what just happened. Read through bits of that multiple times, but it still confused the hell out of me.
Does the author really think that ADHD is an excuse for everything? My friend has it, and she's just really antsy (she also proof-reads my English homework >.>).
I actually like nannies! It's fun to do mean things to them when you're bored, but when it all comes down, they are quite useful.
What does the author have against the welcome wagon?
Also, is anyone else not too sure who this "Berry" is? I think I missed something.
Oct. 24th, 2010 03:01 am (UTC)
Also, is anyone else not too sure who this "Berry" is? I think I missed something.

Ha ha, join the club. I think we all missed something. :P
Oct. 22nd, 2010 04:16 am (UTC)
All the nannies I've had in my game have been useless, or worse than useless. Most of them would leave the toddlers out on the lawn (or the baby lying in its crib with a stinky diaper for hours) so they could watch TV, drink from the bar, play my sim's piano, play pool, and do anything but take care of the children. And there was the one who poked and shoved and slapped the parents around, and the one who I fired who never left the house, and just hung around and wet herself. I never bother with nannies anymore.
Oct. 22nd, 2010 03:53 pm (UTC)
I also don't get all the hate on the nannies. I, for one, find them to be quite helpful. Especially considering I fail at taking care of kids, and they keep the social worker away even when they're starving of hunger! The grammar and spelling needs a lot of work...I must admit I have done the two period ellipsis before, but I am trying to break that habit.
Oct. 22nd, 2010 11:50 pm (UTC)
My friend has ADD/ADHD. Acts hyper, doesn't learn very much because he's so distracted by everything. Could be a valid excuse for some things, I guess.
I don't understand updates that have a storyline to them, or have a layout like this:

Author: *something about sim*
Sim: *speaks to author*
Author: *speaks back to sim*

It's just weird, for updates.
I'm mentioned on this girls' simpage, I think.

They're doin it rong
LOLOLOLOL. She shoulda took the picture a few seconds later.
Or maybe she thinks babies are made by linking arms...
Oct. 22nd, 2010 11:52 pm (UTC)
EDIT: forgot to mention about the nannies. The ones that I get are useless. They just leave the baby and take baths in the garden. Literally, because there's a dog bath in the garden. They also raid the house for cookies and just leave the kids to pretty much kill themselves. At least, that's what they're like in Strangetown.
I don't like them. I'd prefer to move in a friend and have them look after the kids.
Oct. 23rd, 2010 03:18 am (UTC)
*ahem* do not mess with Firestar; the Warriors series is pretty epic. This makes me mad; the Hermione thing does to.
Also, Nessia???? I thought it was Renesmee?
Oct. 24th, 2010 02:48 am (UTC)
The Warriors series is that one with the cats that fight each other or something, right?
Never read them, but I've seen them in the store.
Meh, the Wikipedia article was too long. They any good?
Oct. 23rd, 2010 03:19 am (UTC)
*too. Sorry about that.
Oct. 24th, 2010 03:00 am (UTC)
I...I'm confused. :(

I don't even...the spelling errors are distracting and not funny at all. Unless, of course, Author operates on a plane of existence higher than mere mortals like me, I just don't see the appeal. :/

Nannies can go either way for me. Sometimes, they've just been wonderful with the kids, but at other times, they just do ridiculous things, like bathe the kid when his hygiene bar is full. I tolerate them, for the most part, though. They do okay. :p

Fun sporking, June. Embarrassingly, I snorted out loud several times. I should really be used to that for this comm, but somehow, it's surprising every time...
( 14 comments — Leave a comment )


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